I AM a Strong Black man and as such . . .
- I will carry myself with the grace, dignity and
character of a king at all times.
- I will speak to women as human beings, not as
potential sex partners, not as someone with less value than myself, not
someone I must dominate in order to validate my manhood.
- I will not plan out how I can get a woman into bed
before I even introduce myself.
- I will not judge a woman’s beauty, worth or value by
the length of her hair, the length of her fingernails, the roundness of
her behind or the size of her feet, and most importantly, the color of her
skin, just as I would not want to be judged by the length of my penis, the
size of my wallet, the car I drive, or the amount of money I make.
- I will make every effort to make sure women know that
they are safe when they are in my presence. I will not touch, grope, or physically
intimidate them and I will not make unwanted sexual advances towards them.
- I will NOT strike, restrain, or threaten a
woman.
- I will accept that if a woman says no, she means
she’s not interested in me sexually and that is her right. I will never force a woman to have sex
with me.
- I will ask my women friends, sisters and
acquaintances what makes them feel undervalued, unappreciated and
objectified and I will listen closely and make efforts to correct those
things that I do wrong.
- When a woman tells me something is insensitive,
demeaning, or offensive, I will not dismiss it immediately as male
bashing. I will take her critique
just as I would expect someone to consider mine.
- I will find something other than a woman’s looks to
compliment her about. I will make
note of her intellect, her personality, her ideas, her imagination, and
her accomplishments.
- I will acknowledge that my mother, sister, and
daughters are black women, deserving of respect, and I will work to treat
ALL Black women as I would have other men treat the women in my life.
- I will accept responsibility for my wrongdoings, I
will not lie in an attempt to get away with my misdeeds, I will apologize
when I’ve done something wrong and I will deal with the consequences of my
actions by facing them head on.
- I will not partake in conversations with other men
when they are ridiculing women’s looks, bodies, or opinions.
- I will remove the words bitch, ho, trick, chicken
head, and all other derogatory names for women from my vocabulary because
I recognize them to be sexist and degrading.
- I will not refer to sex with a woman as hitting it,
killing it, stabbing it, or anything that has violent connotations nor
will it diminish the humanity of a woman by referring to sex with her as
getting “it” or getting “some”
- I will not define my manhood by the length of my
penis, I will define my manhood as fulfilling promises I keep, in having
integrity, in choosing mature solutions to problems and how I can be
honest even when it’s difficult.
- I will speak out when I see other men disrespecting
women.
- I will honor my daughters as much as my sons.
- I will not refer to myself as a pimp, a dog, a thug,
or a baller because I will not let racist stereotypes define me.
- I will learn how to communicate my feelings rather
than deny I have them or trying to suppress them with sex, drugs,
adrenaline, or alcohol.
Copyright 2007 Scottie Lowe
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