AfroerotiK

Erotic provocateur, racially-influenced humanist, relentless champion for the oppressed, and facilitator for social change, Scottie Lowe is the brain child, creative genius and the blood, sweat, and tears behind AfroerotiK. Intended to be part academic, part educational, and part sensual, she, yes SHE gave birth to the website to provide people of African descent a place to escape the narrow-mined, stereotypical, limiting and oft-times degrading beliefs that abound about our sexuality. No, not all Black men are driven by lust by white flesh or to create babies and walk away. No, not all Black women are promiscuous welfare queens. And as hard as it may be to believe, no, not all gay Black men are feminine, down low, or HIV positive. Scottie is putting everything on the table to discuss, debate, and dismantle stereotypes in a healthy exchange of ideas. She hopes to provide a more holistic, informed, and enlightened discussion of Black sexuality and dreams of helping couples be more open, honest, and adventurous in their relationships.

Tuesday, October 31, 2006

I Love Getting Fucked in the Ass




Click HERE

This track is only for true anal enthusiasts.  It's explicit, it's hardcore, it's extreme.  At almost 6 minutes long, it's the soundtrack that will accompany you right up to your moment of explosion.  Be forewarned that this is only for those individuals who think that backdoor sex should be natural, raw, and primal.  

Monday, October 30, 2006

Looking for erotic stories to be featured

Please Forward

AfroerotiK.com, the most beautiful, unique, and innovative website dedicated to the sensuality of African Americans, is looking for erotic writers to be featured. We are looking for stories with strong character development and story lines that show the healthy depiction of people of African descent involved in consensual, mature, erotic situations. Correct grammar, punctuation, spelling, and sentence structure are minimum requirements. Stories should be around 2500 words. Stories that depict adultery, sex in exchange for money, or that depict Black men as immoral playboys and women as manipulative gold diggers will not be considered under any circumstances. GBLT and interracial stories are welcomed as well as stories that depict alternative sexual preferences as long as the Black characters are shown as mature, autonomous, and non-stereotypical.



For consideration, please submit your story HERE

Saturday, October 28, 2006

Experience Making Love to Me



Feel my lips gently nibbling on your earlobe, My breath as I whisper in your ear, I want you. Smell the scent of my perfume as it lingers on my skin. Taste my mouth as we kiss. Feel the softness of my lips, my yielding tongue.

Experience my soft, gentle kisses on your neck, your shoulders, and your chest. Relax and enjoy as I kiss your arms, inside your elbows, the palms of your hands. Maintain eye contact with me as I suck each and every one of your fingers.

Relinquish control as I massage your back. Feel the cool sensation as I leave wet kisses on your spine. Feel my breasts crushed against your back as I try to press every inch of our bodies together. Breathe deeply; inhale the aroma of the candles, the oil I use to massage you, my arousal as my passion builds for you. Turn over and face me. Tingle with anticipation as my hands move slowly back up the fronts of your legs, your thighs.

Ache with need as my mouth kisses and licks your torso, carefully avoiding your erection with the exception of my hot breath. Describe the sensation to me as I lick and gently suck your balls. Tell me how it feels as I lick the head of your dick and make it glisten. Watch me as I swallow you, licking you, sucking you, stroking you, blowing your mind. Scream out my name as I bring you to the verge of orgasm and stop. Feel the head of your dick, deep in the back of my throat while my wet, hot lips, tongue, and mouth envelop you entirely.

Experience the need to have me, be inside of me, to fuck me. Look at me. Notice every detail of my body: my bedroom eyes, my full lips, my tiny ears, my small shoulders, my long arms and fingers, the swell of my breasts slowly rising and falling, the contrast of my nipples, my small waist and full hips, my smooth, long, brown legs and tiny ankles, the high arch of my foot and my perfectly pedicured toes.

Make me need you. Press your body onto mine, laying your weight upon me. Whisper all the naughty things you want to do. Kiss me passionately; long, hard and wet. Let me know that you want me, all of me, and only me. Feel my passion for you build as you fondle and caress my breasts, pinching my nipples, cupping them in your hands.

Watch my excitement build as you lower you mouth to my breasts nursing them like a baby, sucking them like a man hungry with desire. Lick them all over, use your tongue like a sensual paintbrush.

Feel the heat from between my legs, spread them. Examine that part of me that makes me a woman. Notice how aroused I become at even the most gentle stimulation. Touch me softly and watch me writhe in pleasure. Spread my lips apart, feeling my wetness flow. Smell my sex, natural and sweet. Invade me with your fingers. Manipulate that vacant and slippery space with skill. Make me give you my surrender. Invade me with your tongue. Taste me, eat me, lick me, suck me.

And then calmly reassure me of your love. Look deeply into my eyes and let me know that everything will be fine, that you will take care of me, that I dont need to be afraid. And with the hunger of a starving man, the thrill of the first time…………penetrate me. Close your eyes and feel our bodies become one. Experience my gift to you.

Make love to me. Slow, steady. hard, deep. Drive your dick up inside me over and over again. Make me scream with pleasure and ecstasy divine. Fuck me until our bodies are glistening with sweat. Feel my pussy grab you and pull you deep inside of me. Tell me how tight and wet and hot I am and how good my pussy makes you feel. Faster …Deeper. Experience the addiction of pleasure over take your body. And then my dear, sweet lover, fill me with your seed, that which makes me whole. Dont move, dont move, DONT MOVE. Just enjoy the experience of making love to me.



Copyright 2004 AfroerotiK

Thursday, October 26, 2006

Knowing True and Abiding Love

When I was young, I used to watch my grandmother clip my grandfather's toenails. I thought that was the most disgusting, subservient, oppressive act a woman could do. I was embarrassed that my grandfather NEVER washed his own hair. He would take a shower every morning and he wouldn't wash his hair, he would let my grandmother do it in a dining room chair with a shampoo/conditioner whole setup. In the summers, when I would sew my back to school wardrobe, we had to clean up every day at 4:00 to make sure the house was straightened and dinner was on the table for my grandfather at 6:00. Submissive right? No independent woman of today would ever do those things for a man that would be beneath her.

Well, it wasn't until I was a grown woman that I understood that having dinner on the table would have meant nothing if he wasn't home every night at 6:00. My grandmother never worked, so all the material we would buy for my school clothes, all the shopping trips we would take all over the city, were funded by my grandfather who gave her money unconditionally. My grandmother never wrote a check in her life because my grandfather made sure all the bills were paid. There was never a day when the lights were cut off, there was no phone, or there was a threat of being evicted. Those things didn't happen by accident, my grandfather never ran the streets, his friends were their friends, he was stable and committed and he loved to spoil my grandmother. Any whim she had, he fulfilled. Any concern or fear she had he erased.
I'd wash my man's feet, hair and do a harem dance every night if I could find a man who was as committed to me as my grandfather was to my grandmother.

Love is give and take, it's not being subservient. Was my grandmother a slave because she clipped my grandfather's toenails? Hardly. She was a loving woman who felt honored to do for her man in a way that no one else could.

Today, we are too selfish. We want someone to clip our toenails and sacrifice for us but we don't want to do it for someone else. We want to have someone cater t6 our needs and wants and wishes and we have no concept of what it is to sacrifice for someone else. Worse yet, we think that sacrificing for someone is negative.

We don't know what love is. We know what narcissism is. We know what self centeredness is. We know that we want someone to make us feel good but we have no concept of how to make someone else feel special, romanced, or loved. How many men would kill for a woman to cook for them every night? Would they be willing to give up hanging out at happy hour and drinking with the boys or would you be able to pull off planning a dream vacation where all your wife had to do was shop and pack? Every woman in the world would want to have her man to buy her minks and diamonds and have as much money as you want to go shopping while knowing that they never have to worry about their man cheating but what are they willing to give in exchange.

Love is recognizing that you lose nothing by putting your partner on a pedestal. I saw evidence of 61 years of love when my grandfather would grease my grandmother’s scalp and comb her hair when she was too sick to do it herself. I saw love when my grandmother wanted to renew their marriage vows and my grandfather let her have her dream wedding. I saw love when my grandmother didn’t try to drain the bank account with extravagance that would leave them penniless just because she could. I witnessed love when my grandfather retired and my grandmother got her first retirement check, completely separate from his, that was over $1200 a month. When my grandfather told her that it was hers, I knew that he had worked 55 years to see that look of joy on her face, to provide for her. When my grandmother wanted a new washer and dryer, it would be installed before the week was out; and my grandmother would wash and iron my grandfather’s shirts better than the cleaners. I’ve seen true love, I’ve witnessed what it is to care for someone so much that your every thought is in how to make them happy. Their love was yin and yang. I’d give a major organ to be able to experience love like that.

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

Has the Black community given up on love?















Has the Black community given up on the concept of love? Are we now solely focused on self and what someone can do for us rather than building a partnership based on love? What is love? Do Black men and women know how to love one another anymore? What does a healthy, loving relationship consist of? What are the things that make up a healthy loving relationship? What will it take for us to believe in love again or are people too damaged to even know how to form a relationship based on love?

Share your thoughts and opinions.

Monday, October 23, 2006

Swinging 101 in Black and white


I've noticed several trends in the swinging lifestyle that are different between Black and white participants. When Black couples go to a swing club it's for different reasons than white couples. I've been to mixed clubs, all Black clubs (still stands as the most erotic and sensual experience I've ever had) and I've been to private parties where all the people were Black.

When white couples go out to swing clubs, it's primarily so the wife can fuck other people, mostly men but occasionally women. She's dressed like a hooker and he's dressed like it’s dress down Friday at the office. White women will dance together in groups like at prom while the hubbies stand and watch. Anyone who has been to Trapeze or 2 Risque can atest to that. Black couples look like they are a couple, dressed for a Friday or Saturday night at the club, attractive, stylish but nothing over the top and certainly nothing where the woman could be confused for a prostitute.

White people don't really care about making a connection with whomever they hook up with, they go for appearance first and foremost and it stops there. White women will walk up to me and say, "Oh my god, you are so sexy,” and the next thing you know, they are on their knees trying to eat my pussy without asking me my name, or if I'm even interested in them going down on me. Black couples want to have a drink with the person or couple they hook up with, they want to have a while where they bond first, get to know each other and then go off to play.
It's far more about exhibitionism with white couples than it is for black couples. White men want their wives to be seen, they want people to watch and join in. Black couples want to go off to a private room together and get busy behind closed doors. I’m not saying that Black couples don’t get off on being seen but I’m saying that if you have a club with private rooms, Black couples will be lined up waiting for a room and when the door opens and the people come out, it will usually be occupied by Black couples.

White women, 9 times out of 10, will ride their husband on top. You rarely see a white dude downstroking at a swing club. Anyone who goes, check it out next time. If I'm lying I'm dying. If you see a white couple together, husband and wife, the wife is almost always riding old boy and he's chilling out relaxing. Brothas are always hitting it, working out the technique, driving it home. If a black woman is on top, you can be sure there’s another black women riding his face and they are kissing and sucking each other’s titties and whathaveyou.

White men do eat pussy a helluva lot more and in fact, they will bring their women to orgasm with their mouths more and not have the need to have sex after that. Brothas, based on my observations, eat pussy as foreplay before getting to the fucking. There are exceptions to every rule. The friends I used to go with for example, I never fucked, I only had oral sex with them. My boy would eat my pussy so well people would gather around just to watch me nut all over the place. If I had been willing to have sex with him, however, I can almost promise you that eating pussy would have only been the appetizer. One can only assume that white couples, man and wife, don’t have any such “no fucking” restrictions so eating pussy as the appetizer, entrée, and dessert is by choice and not by force.

And for the most part, white couples are far less vocal during sex. White women can cum and you'd never know it. They might breathe a little heavier and you have to assume they had an orgasm. There might be one or two white guys in the spot talking shit but the majority are not. Black couples are talking shit, moaning, groaning, and being expressive. I have seen white women screaming and acting a fool, but usually only when they are with black men. I saw this one white chick get the shit beat out of her in a BDSM room and she didn't even whimper. Go figure.

Single brothas are WAY more respectful in swing club environments. White men want to touch and put their hands on women without asking. Brothas have more manners, they'll ask and if you say stop, they apologize and don't do it again. White men will think that just because you are in a different room that gives them permission to try to jerk off on you again. The one opportunity I had to go with someone who I was dating, he was very protective of me, making sure that no one touched me or made me uncomfortable. I liked that more than when I went with my friends; I was pretty much on my own having to deal with unwanted advances.

I've NEVER seen a Black woman have a gangbang situation, in all Black swing clubs or in interracial ones. I've seen porno’s of it where ghetto mamas are getting banged by five or six dudes at the same time but I've never seen it in real life. I'm sure it happens but I've never seen it. I've seen white women get fucked by men and she never even saw their faces; fucked in the pussy, fucked in the ass, fucked without condoms, while hubby stands there and jerks off.

Black people show up after midnight, white people are standing in line when the door opens. We do have a different time orientation than white people. It’s considered negative because it’s different than the norm for white people but it is simply an indication that we are less rigid in how we view linear time, not a negative stigma that indicates we are somehow inferior.

And anyone else who has been to a swing club can testify. White men have erectile dysfunction a whole HELLUVA lot more than brothas. I've seen more white men with dicks that won't get nowhere close to being hard masturbating for hours at the spot.

I’ve only been to swing clubs in ATL, so there are possibly different dynamics in other cities. NYC and LA I’m sure have different dynamics. Interracial couples bring a whole nutha set of rules to the table. I’ve not seen many black women with white men at swing clubs but I’m sure that’s logistical as well. In LA or NY, I’m sure black women are stepping out with white men in larger numbers. I can recall one couple (BW/WM) who were pretty regular at Venus and they were both a little on the heavy side and it appeared that she was his domme.

From a person who thought swinging was nasty and disgusting before I went, to a person who can’t wait to find a committed partner to share in the erotic experience again, I’ve changed my perspective about what it is, and what it brings to a relationship. One thing is for sure, it brings a whole different element to Black relationships than it does to white ones. Perhaps we can delve deeper into the why’s and the mechanics of the differences with open discussion and dialogue.

Friday, October 20, 2006

Celebrities adopting African children

Take a look around at all the websites and online communities of white couples that want the wives "bred" black. There is a perverse and widespread fascination for white people to want black babies. Celebrities can't just show up on the cover of People magazine as pregnant and then push out a black baby without it causing a scandal. The next best thing to do is to adopt a black child from Africa and claim it's a humanitarian issue.

For celebrities, African children are the new fashion accessory. Last year it was dogs that fit in your purse, this year it's African children. There are countless numbers of children, both white and black that need to be adopted right here in the US. This compulsion for the exotic is yet another indication of how fucked up we are as a society and how dysfunctional behaviors are passed off as normal. Tom Cruise was the first to adopt Black children with Nicole. There's a little more evidence that he's not dealing from a full deck now that he has his own child and we can observe his behaviors and actions and assess that his parenting skills might not be optimal. Angelina seems to have turned her life around, from tongue kissing her brother in front of the world and wearing vials of blood from her husband, to a true humanitarian. I don't know what sort of person she is, nor do I know what sort of parent she is but she seems sincere in her efforts to bring light to the struggles of people of color throughout the world. Is her desire to have brown babies indicative of this trend we see for white people to purge themselves of a collective white guilt? Who knows? But there are all sorts of pathological implications and trends that aren’t going to be discussed in public forums that are motivating factors in many people’s actions.

Madonna has lived her life trying to be controversial. I’m sure she’s upset that she didn’t think of the idea first. There are lots of women who have children of their own for selfish reasons, Madonna isn’t the first, she won’t be the last. Will her child have a better life in England than Malawi, financially yes. Will he grow up to liberate Black people and end the reign of the fallacy of white supremacy? Hell no. Brittany Spears shouldn’t be anyone’s mother, not her own children, not her half black step children, not $3.00 hamsters from the Wal-mart pet store. She is however, a better alternative than living without clean water. It’s only a matter of time before B-list celebrities start adopting Black children to get back on top. “Tara Reid, I’m sorry I don’t have any roles for you but why not adopt an African baby to get you back on the front page.” One thing I can almost promise you won’t happen; Black celebrities won’t be adopting any African babies any time soon.

Every child deserves a family that loves them and cherishes them. In the scheme of life, any child that has the opportunity to have a better life by being adopted is a good thing. Will celebrities who adopt black babies cause a rip in the fabric of the universe, no. Will it be psychologically healthy for children of color to be raised by superficial, attention starved, materialistic people? On a scale from one to ten, it’s a 1; there are far worse things for a child to endure. Starvation, abuse, neglect, rape, are rank a 10 and any child that can be spared those things is a blessing, without question. Children in Africa are no more deserving of adoption than those that are here in our borders but any child who gets a stable home is a check in the plus column.

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

Rasing my vibration on this day

A cosmic trigger event is occurring on the 17th of October 2006. This is the beginning, one of many trigger events to come between now and 2013. An ultraviolet (UV) pulse beam radiating from higher dimensions in universe-2 will cross paths with the Earth on this day. Earth will remain approximately within this UV beam for 17 hours of your time.

This beam resonates with the heart chakra, it is radiant fluorescent in nature, blue/magenta in color. Although it resonates in this frequency band, it is above the color frequency spectrum of your universe-1 which you, Earth articulate in. However due to the nature of your soul and soul groups operating from Universe-2 frequency bands it will have an effect.

The effect is every thought and emotion will be amplified intensely one million-fold. Yes, we will repeat, all will be amplified one millions time and more. Every thought, every emotion, every intent, every will, no matter if it is good, bad, ill, positive, negative, will be amplified one million times in strength.

What does this mean ?

Since all matter manifest is due to your thoughts, i.e. what you focus on, this beam will accelerate these thoughts and solidify them at an accelerated rate making them manifest a million times faster than they normally would. For those that do not comprehend yet. " Your thoughts => what you focus on, create YOUR experience of reality. "

This UV beam thus can be a dangerous tool. For if you are focused on thoughts which are negative to your liking they will manifest into your reality almost instantly. Then again this UV beam can be a gift if you choose it to be.



May the Creator add light and love to my thoughts so that they may become manifest

I desire the end of the reign of white supremacy that has oppressed people of color for thousands of years.

I desire a restoration of balance and harmony to the consciousness of the earth that is aligned with the universe, one verse, the Creator of All.

I desire the end of the fallacy of male supremacy and a restoration of equality of human beings not based on genitals but based on the symbiotic relationship between genders.

I desire those human beings who have perpetuated hatred, oppression, war, and evil for profit to receive just earthly punishments for their behavior while in human form.

I desire the end of religious beliefs that were created by man to control and dominate the masses and desire a more holistic, connected spiritual path based on truth to be ushered forth

I desire earthly restitution for the people of color who have suffered genocide, enslavement, and cultural annihilation at the hands of Caucasians.

I desire an energy of peace and love to envelop this earth plane and infuse our spirits with truth.

I desire the veil of illusion that has been placed over people of African descent to be lifted so that we might see exactly how debilitating assimilation into white culture is for our beings.

I desire self-love and confidence in my abilities

I desire to release the negative self talk that haunts my subconscious mind

I invite unconditional love from my divine right partner, my twin flame into my life so that I might be able to give and receive human love abundantly while in this body SOON

I desire the opportunity to give birth to a child who will grow up to surpass my lofty expectations and goals for him or her

I desire to be a mother to children whom I can raise, love, and nurture with my husband to teach them the ways of a spiritual warrior and enlightened being.

I desire the ability to remain humble in the face of financial success and acclaim

I acknowledge that my words have power and I desire that they will go forth to the masses and be received in such a way that they will usher in transformations, education, and healing

I desire my book, In Loving Color, with photography by Aaron Brown, to become a phenomenal best seller and open doors to dialogue about Black sexuality that will free us from mental chains that keep us enslaved to debilitating mindsets
I desire AfroerotiK to be the foundation for an erotic revolution that will generate workshops, videos, magazines, CDs, conferences, healing centers, radio programs, and any and all multi media opportunities that will create more opportunities for Black people and relationships to heal.

I desire healing for my mother so that she can be release from her need to manipulate and control, so that she might see her own pathological behaviors and be able to release them easily.

I desire healing for Emmanuel.

I desire happiness for Chelsie and Khelsea

I desire a healthy relationship for Tanya

I desire a life filled with learning, art, culture, good food, good friends, great music, and harmony.

I desire the reverence to respect the earth and the environment with every action I take

Monday, October 16, 2006

Consciousness Quiz for African Americans



For each question, choose the answer that best represents your feelings. Do not write in answers, do not skip a question if you don’t see an answer that you like. In some questions, you’ll find an immediate answer you will agree with and on other’s you will have a strong urge to disagree with all of them. Choose the answer that BEST represents your feelings. For ease, copy and paste the quiz into a word document and remove all the answers except the one you pick. DO NOT change the answers.

1. Age
A. 18-27
B. 28-36
C. 37-45
D. 46-54
E. Older

2. Gender
A. Male
B. Female
C. Transgendered

3. Sexual Orientation
A. Straight
B. Bi
C. Gay or Lesbian

4. I would classify my debt as
A. Nothing more than just some friends and family I know who have helped me out when I was in a jam
B. A car note and credit cards mostly
C. A mortgage, school loans for myself or my children, and a home equity line of credit that was used to finance a project I was working on
D. Eternal to the spirits and orisha who guide my spiritual path

5. I identify myself as
A. A Human being not dictated to by color
B. Unapologetically African
C. African American or Black
D. A Nigga for Life

6. If I won 100,000 in the lottery, I would
A. Drink, smoke, sex, and party like there was no tomorrow while flossing in my brand new Hummer
B. Pay off my bills first, treat myself, and then invest anything left over
C. Never win in the first place, only morons buy lottery tickets
D. Buy some property in a warm climate and live off the land simply
Choose the answer that BEST represents your feelings.

7. Africa is
A. My cultural and spiritual homeland, the place where I long to return
B. A cesspool filled with AIDS, famine, and poverty
C. The country where slaves came from
D. The birthplace of Christianity

8. Big noses and thick lips are
A. Easily corrected with plastic surgery
B. Ugly
C. Beautiful
D. The facial features of many African Americans

9. Relaxers and Weaves
A. Are just one of the many styling options for African American hair, nothing more nothing less
B. Make women more attractive when done subtly
C. Cost too much money in salons when they can look just as good if you get someone who knows what they are doing
D. Enslave Black women to European standards of beauty

10. Christianity is
A. A tool used by the white slave masters to keep enslaved Africans mentally and spiritually oppressed
B. The best thing to come out of slavery. It saved heathen Africans from eternal damnation
C. Best practiced in silent reverence, without all that singing and shouting
D. No big thing to me, I gotta make money now and worry about heaven later

11. Welfare is
A. A failed liberal social Democratic agenda that drains the pockets of hardworking, tax-paying, productive citizens
B. Easily manipulated if you know how to play the game
C. A pittance thrown at Black people to maintain the undereducated and underemployed status of the oppressed
D. Most often an excuse for some Black people in the ghetto not to get a job.

12. Politically, I
A. Vote straight Democratic Party because historically Democrats have always been for Black people
B. Support fiscal conservatism and the immediate cease and desist of all liberal social and foreign policies
C. Am a card carrying communist, socialist, anarchist . . . whatever party represents the overthrow of this Fascist government
D. Could care less, voting don’t change a damn thing
Choose the answer that BEST represents your feelings.

13. Homosexuality is
A. A natural expression of human sexuality
B. An agenda, along with the Jews, to control the media
C. Not my cup of tea but what people do behind closed doors is their business
D. Freaky Deaky

14. 9/11 was
A. A highly suspicious act that set the stage for the US to wage war in oil rich middle eastern countries and oppress people of color
B. An attack against the principles of liberty and justice for all.
C. Sad but at least I didn’t know anyone who got killed
D. Equally as catastrophic as Hurricane Katrina

15. Illegal Immigrants
A. Can be kept out as long as we build a wall on the Mexican Border
B. Do the jobs I sure as hell wouldn’t do
C. Are innocent victims of capitalism and corporate greed
D. Should be prosecuted in a court of law and made to pay a fine for the burden on the taxpayers they’ve caused

16. Hurricane Katrina
A. Left a legacy of untreated Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and depression that will manifest for generations to come
B. Showed just how stupid and criminal people can be if they don’t follow instructions
C. Was sad but was more than likely God’s way of ridding the earth of sinners to prepare for the return of Christ
D. Victims got PAID after the storm

17. Slavery
A. Was no more or less horrific than the Holocaust and the Jews rebounded just fine
B. Was in that movie Roots with Kunta Kinte and Chicken George
C. The fault of greedy African Kings who sold their brothers and sisters to White people
D. Is going to work every day for a corporate boss and making a substandard living while the CEO’s lavish in luxury

18. When it comes to food
A. Variety is the spice of life
B. I stick to hot wings and fast food most of the time
C. I prefer to fast every once in a while to re-energize my spirit
D. There’s nothing like a succulent Prawns with a mango salsa

Choose the answer that BEST represents your feelings.

19. Interracial Dating
A. Will end racism and discrimination in a couple of years when everyone is brown
B. Is reflective of centuries of brainwashing and an inherent belief in white supremacy
C. Makes the pretties babies
D. Is a viable option for many people who are climbing the corporate ladder and looking for partners who are intellectual equals.

20. Black men
A. Who are on the downlow are responsible for the spread of AIDS
B. Struggle with defining themselves because of years of conforming to the white man’s standards
C. Have the biggest dicks
D. Are criminal, lazy, drug addicts who do nothing all day long

21. Black women
A. Have the biggest asses
B. Show signs of self preservation when they marry outside their race
C. Represent the embodiment of the Goddess herself
D. Are achieving more in corporate America these days

22. Black people are
A. The originators of the humanities and sciences in ancient KMT
B. Equal to white people in every way
C. Always trying to blame someone else for their problems
D. Always going to be held down by the white man


Copyright 2006 AfroerotiK
All rights reserved
Scottie Lowe
fantasies@afroerotik.com

Tired of seeing black women being portrayed as ghetto bitches, freaks and whores, and black men as barely literate thugs, bulls, and pimps, Scottie Lowe decided it was time to show black people in a positive sexual light. Ms. Lowe is the sole owner and founder of www.AfroerotiK.com, a company dedicated to eradicating the negative and stereotypical depictions of Black sexuality and providing customized, personalized erotic stories for and about people of color. Her innovative approach to writing Black and interracial erotica is shattering misperceptions and opening the doors to dialogue about subjects long considered taboo.

Saturday, October 14, 2006

Being the Partner I Want to Attract



I haven’t been in a real relationship in over 15 years. I haven’t been in anything that lasted more than a month. Well, that’s not true, I was with a young lady and we were partnered for about three months. I cooked for her, and planned special evenings with her and picked her up from work, the stuff you do when you are in a relationship with someone. It didn’t work with her because she had never been with another woman before and it was too much for her to handle the concept of being lesbian. She wasn’t able to be honest with herself that she was capable of forming a loving/emotional relationship with another woman so she sabotaged it by compulsive lying. Why it never works out with men I’ll never know.

I do know that with every person I meet, with every person I feel has potential, I try my best to be the sort of partner I want to attract. I make very conscious efforts to put into practice all the things that I’ve read about what it takes to form a healthy relationship. I don’t project my emotions onto the other person, I ask for what I want rather than assuming he can read my mind. I do my best to communicate my concerns in a way that doesn’t put him on the offensive but gives space for me to establish my boundaries. I apologize when we have an argument and I overreact. I’ve always been a great cheerleader/supporter/confidant. I don’t play games and I let my true feelings be known. I’m honest to a fault about my shortcomings and I ask for assistance in helping to grow. In short, I try to put out the energy that I want back. If I were in a relationship, I would want my partner to do those things for me as well.

It’s not working. As hard as I try, I’m not getting the same energy back. There must be some sort of glitch in the Matrix because I’m not meeting men who are as committed to forming a healthy as I am. I don’t think it’s too much to ask for someone to be able to be my cheerleader when I’m down. I’m not superwoman, I do get down occasionally and I’d like someone to say, “Don’t pay attention to those people trying to tear you down, you are a gifted and talented visionary and you have a mission and you are doing a damn good job accomplishing it.” I don’t think it’s too much to ask for someone to apologize for a miscommunication, and especially not when he’s said something that was intended to hurt my feelings.

For every action, there’s an equal and opposite reaction, right? I’m putting the energy out and I’m not getting it back. I try my best to be the sort of partner that someone else would find desirable, to display qualities that would make someone want to form a relationship with me and I’m not getting any rewards here. Where’s the equal and opposite effort? Where’s the willingness to work through disagreements in a healthy manner? Where’s the willingness to prioritize me and my happiness just as I would prioritize him and his? I’m ready to be this phenomenal cook, lover, seamstress and all around creative/sensual diva (with the potential to make a helluva lotta money to boot) to my man and either no one is appreciating what’ I’m bringing to the table or no one is willing to bring anything to the table themselves. Is there no justice in the universe? Is there no respect for the laws of metaphysics in that I’m projecting my desires and not getting the same in return?