Try
as I might to get the Afrikan-centered community involved in this dialogue,
they seem to think it’s not Afrikan centered to discuss sexuality, especially
any topics that they deem Eurocentric. I
am always confronted with the argument that AfroerotiK is not Afrikan-centered
because it addresses homosexuality and the Afrikan-centered community denounces
homosexuality in all of its forms.
Because
I am an outspoken member of the Afrikan-centered community and bisexual, I will
address those claims, defend my position, and outline how AfroerotiK lends 100%
of its energy to the promotion of an Afrikan-centered ideology. AfroerotiK’s mission, first and foremost is
to educate and enlighten Africans born in America. To do so, you have to reach people where they
are. As president, owner, and sole
driving force behind AfroerotiK, I can say that while I would love for all
descendents of kidnapped Africans throughout the Diaspora to embrace Africa as
their cultural and spiritual homeland, I fully recognize that is a reality far
from fruition. Black people, especially
here in the US, usually want nothing to do with Africa and must be re-educated
about our history, we have to have the centuries old brainwashing that we have
endured reprogrammed, we must look to challenge the way we see life and how we
navigate the planet. Black sexuality is
cancerous as is. There’s no question
about it that what passes as healthy sexuality in the black community is
leading us to an even further and further breakdown of communication and
intimacy. How does one attempt to
restore a healthy way to engage people sexually? Do you do so by condemning people for their
beliefs and behaviors, or does the true Africentrist look to the origins of the
behaviors, look to the gain an understanding of the person, and try to push
themselves to expand their consciousness and embrace a higher way of looking at
things?
Karenga,
Dr. Ben and a host of other male Afrikan-centered scholars all denounce
homosexuality as being outside of the parameters of Afrikan-centered
ideology. While I respect their
contributions to the academic body that makes up their scholarship, I
respectfully submit that I don’t think that they’ve evolved past the sexist,
patriarchal and misogynist mindsets that have been engrained in African
American men for centuries. Black men
have struggled for so long to try to gain the power that white men have had,
they are hard pressed to accept a reality that says that women are equal, that
homosexuality doesn’t determine one’s masculinity or femininity, or that there
just may be another way to look at life than the knee jerk conservatism that
we’ve been fed. To simply denounce
homosexuality as wrong and not consider that their may be other alternatives to
heterosexuality is a Euro-centered as one can possibly be. To imply that there is only one way and
anything else is wrong is exactly what the slave master would have wanted us to
believe, so to use that same line of reasoning to condemn people within our
community is absurd. The
Afrikan-centered community’s failure to embrace homosexuality is the exact same
behavior expressed in the Christian community whereby the congregation and
choir is littered with gay men and turns a blind eye to their behaviors. Both mindsets are flawed and both need to be
addressed if we as a people are to move forward to a truly healthy
Afrikan-centered paradigm.
Sobunfu Some,
(http://www.sobonfu.com/) in her work, The Spirit of Intimacy: Ancient African Teachings
in the Ways of Relationships, wrote of the gatekeepers, or individuals who were
homosexual and were regarded as spiritual sentinels between the earth plane and
the heavens. She clearly outlines how
homosexuality was NOT regarded as a sin in pre-colonial African communities,
but rather revered as a sacred gift and homosexuals were revered, not
reviled. Both she and her husband,
Malidoma, have repeatedly spoken out that this belief that homosexuality is an
unnatural from an African viewpoint is wrong.
Rather than accept the research and observation of African scholars who
have bridged the Eastern and Western cultures, who have explored both spiritual
and earthly realms, those that claim to be Africentric in many cases, insist
that homosexuality is wrong and there’s no room for discussion.
Many of the
behaviors and practices of contemporary homosexuals can be seen as wrong, but
they don’t have a corner on that market.
For as many promiscuous and manipulative homosexuals there are, there
are ten times as many heterosexuals committing the same or more egregious
offenses, debasing the intent of what sex should be about. The gender of the person that one engages in
sex with has little or nothing to do with engaging in sex as a vehicle for
communication, a way to share intimacy, and a medium of meditation and
connection to the One Most High. If two
individuals come together in love, respecting and cherishing one another,
committed to fostering growth and evolution in one another, it shouldn’t matter
if they have the same genitals or not.
Homophobia
is probably one of the most euro-centered beliefs one can foster. I strongly believe that bisexuality is the
natural state of human beings. That does
not mean that I think that given a chance, everyone will become a homosexual
and procreation as we know it will cease.
Afrikan-centered homophobia is based on the belief that if a man is
homosexual then he will be less than a man.
Do not for a minute believe that if a man desires to penetrated or
engage in same sex eroticism, that makes him feminine or less of a man or is a
woman desires to be intimate with another woman she is abnormal. There are a myriad of factors that contribute
to an individual’s sexual preferences.
Genetic factors, influences during essential childhood development
stages, adolescent sexual abuse and molestation, societal and religious
ingrained fears, and unexplainable sociological and psychological factors all
contribute to a person’s sexual orientation.
To suggest that melanin alone prohibits one from being attracted to the
same gender is absurd.
How
does who I sleep with have anything whatsoever to do with my ability to share
my knowledge, to help heal my people, to embrace Africa as my cultural and
spiritual homeland? I have had far too
many brothas in the Africentric community try to fuck me and not even pretend
to want a relationship with me. Is
promiscuous, un-emotional, causal sex more Afrikan-centered than me loving a
woman and building a strong, monogamous relationship? It’s funny how the Africentric community can
INSIST upon the objectification of women vis-Ã -vis the perpetuation of
polygamous relationships that are solely purposed to stroke the male sexual ego
when there is more than enough evidence that many, many African cultures
embraced matrilineal societies. It seems
that Afrikan-centered has to mean catered to appease the ego to the
heterosexual male or it’s not valid.
Male
homophobia is almost too comical to debate.
“That’s for exit only” “A real man doesn’t like that freaky stuff” That
absurd rhetoric is from socialization and conditioning, and it’s not even close
to being based on any sort of truth.
I’ve said it before and I’m going to say it again. The prostate is a male sexual organ that is
located within the rectum. It is HEALTHY
for it to be stimulated. Sharing
intimacy with a person that happens to have the same genitals as you does NOT
decrease your ability to be honest, to communicate effectively. “Gay” behaviors and homosexuality are related
but different issues. It’s closed minded
to suggest that the ONLY healthy relationships are those between men and
women. I guess that’s why I’m no longer
Christian and hold no ties to the guilt ridden Judeo Christian rules that tell
me that I’m going to burn in hell for loving another woman while a man that
fucks any and every woman he can without regard for her feelings gets the stamp
of Afrocentric approval? Indeed.
What a
beautiful world it would be if anyone was free to find intimacy with whomever
added the most value to his or her life without any silly restrictions. It’s difficult to imagine a world where
people sought out intimacy and not sex, and that genitals were insignificant in
the pursuit of true communion. I guess
I’m alone in my vision. I am committed
to the healthy expression of Black sexuality.
That includes any and all sexual expression that is SAFE, sane, and
consensual. I will NOT promote, condone,
endorse, or defend any expressions of homophobia, patriarchy, sexism, or any
other limiting and oppressive belief that narrowly defines sexuality or places
restrictive guidelines on collective erotic practices. I seek to foster the intimate, communicative
sexual expression of couples, regardless of gender or orientation. The backbone and foundation of a community is
in the health and stability of its relationships. Honesty and open communication are key to
building a great relationship. I will
NOT promote, condone, endorse, or defend any expressions of sex in exchange for
money or fulfillment of selfish sexual desires that disregard the emotional
needs of one’s partner.
My
acceptance and willingness to embrace ALL people of African descent, regardless
of their sexual or gender orientation, is far more Afrikan centered than only
acknowledging those that are invested in perpetuating patriarchy. Connecting to
an individual’s spirit is far more holistic and Afrikan-centered than
homophobia.
