AfroerotiK
Erotic provocateur, racially-influenced humanist, relentless champion for the oppressed, and facilitator for social change, Scottie Lowe is the brain child, creative genius and the blood, sweat, and tears behind AfroerotiK. Intended to be part academic, part educational, and part sensual, she, yes SHE gave birth to the website to provide people of African descent a place to escape the narrow-mined, stereotypical, limiting and oft-times degrading beliefs that abound about our sexuality. No, not all Black men are driven by lust by white flesh or to create babies and walk away. No, not all Black women are promiscuous welfare queens. And as hard as it may be to believe, no, not all gay Black men are feminine, down low, or HIV positive. Scottie is putting everything on the table to discuss, debate, and dismantle stereotypes in a healthy exchange of ideas. She hopes to provide a more holistic, informed, and enlightened discussion of Black sexuality and dreams of helping couples be more open, honest, and adventurous in their relationships.
Tuesday, August 12, 2014
I am a Colored Girl
Monday, August 11, 2014
My Love/Hate Affair with My Country
The Revolution has to be Televised
You will not be motivated to riot in the streets.
You will not want to even get off the couch to look for the remote to change the channel.
The revolution has to be televised or Black people will miss it.
The revolution has to be televised in High Definition with a hip-hop soundtrack or it will be completely missed.
The revolution will be a video game for Wii to get your heart rate going.
The revolution has to be televised
The revolution has to be televised because Black people will never read a newspaper.
The soldiers of the revolution will have intensive combat training with Solange.
The revolution has to star Kevin Hart or Black folks will not have a clue the revolution has begun.
The revolution will be brought to you by that vodka endorsed by Diddy.
The revolution will have to be an awards show or Black folk won't give a damn about it.
The revolution will be a leaked as a sex tape with Kimye.
The revolution has to be televised
The revolution has to be degrading and offensive.
You have to subscribe to Comcast for the revolution because Direct TV doesn't carry it.
Subscribe to Amazon Prime to watch the revolution on your Kindle and Netflix will offer season one.
The revolution? There's an app for that.
The revolution will have a commercial with a couple of those Real Housewives.
The revolution has to be televised
Don't worry, if you miss the revolution, you can watch it on YouTube.
The Revolution has to be televised because Black people don't want to create social change.
They want to Tivo the revolution and watch it in the comfort of their own home.
The revolution will be released on DVD at Red Box with a coupon code.
The #revolution has to be 140 characters or less.
The revolution has to be televised
The revolution has to be televised
The revolution will be 6 seconds long. Do it for the Vine, ain't gonna do it.
God help the revolution if it is scheduled to air in the same time slot as Scandal.
The revolution will be available On Demand, free with your subscription.
The generals of the revolution will have to say the word nigga a hundred times before anyone listens.
The revolution will have its own Facebook page, follow the revolution on Instagram and Tumblr.
The revolution has gots to be televised
The revolution "be like" barely literate.
Who has time for a revolution?
Download the revolution to your I-pod and listen to on your way to the corporate plantation.
The revolution will be produced and directed by Tyler Perry.
It will star Lil Wayne if he's not in rehab and Rihanna's uniform will be see-through.
The revolution has to be televised
Without television, there will be no revolution
The winner of the revolution will be determined by viewer votes. Texting rates may apply.
The revolution will be nominated for an Emmy as "Best Comedy of the Year"
The revolution will be a telethon with an 800 number to call in and pledge money.
"Hey, what happened to all that money donated for that Revolution thing?"
The revolution is dead.
The revolution died long ago.
The revolution has to be televised!
The revolution has to be televised!
The revolution has to be televised!
Copyright 2014 Scottie Lowe. All rights reserved.
Unprotected
Some ago I was the "houseguest" of someone with whom I've had sex with for many many years. We used condoms twice, when we first met, and haven't used one since. I KNOW him to be a pathological liar. I KNOW that he was having unprotected sex with multiple partners when I was sleeping with him. I KNOW for a fact that he was engaged in high risk behaviors with people who were potentially infected. He would tell me that he loved me, that he wanted to be inside me, and he wanted to give me a baby and I would spread my legs and invite him to my sacred space without a condom. The year before that, I met a younger man, substantially younger who was altogether brilliant and who has an entire matching set of baggage due to sexual molestation as a child. We waited a month before we slept together. He told me he loved me. He told me that the wanted to be my man. I craved the connection and the intimacy. No condom.
Six months before that, I met a man who was a promoter for a Black swing club. There was no profession of love, there was no promise of a future together, there was no long history or extended courtship. I hadn't had sex in eighteen months prior to that and I was lonely and horny and the first time he kissed me I felt electricity course through my body. We slept together the very next time we saw each other and every step of the way I kept saying to myself, "I should tell him to use a condom." I didn't.
The truth of the matter is, sex without condoms feels incredible. For me, it's symbolic of the pure, unadulterated love I'm longing to share with someone. I have no doubt in my mind that my not having a child is a biological trigger for my poor and unhealthy risky behavior. If I, Ms. sexually aware and painfully celibate, is engaging in unsafe sex practices, when I've seen the effects of AIDS taking its toll on someone, then I'm quite sure that there are millions upon millions more who aren't as self aware, who aren't as secure with their sexuality, who making the same unhealthy choices and worse.
Black women, especially the ones that are the most outwardly critical of bisexual men, are the most likely to engage in unsafe sex. They put the responsibility of their HIV status on their partners, they don't take ownership of their responsibility of keep themselves HIV negative. They are the women who are BEGGING men to not use condoms, telling them that they are offended if a man says he wants to use a condom with them. I've spoken to countless bisexual men who tell me that they were in the heat of the moment and they wanted to use condoms with women and the women insisted that they not use a condom.
I've seen condom use in swing clubs. I've spoken to many a married man who says that they love their wives too much to bring a disease home (I know, cheating is the ultimate disrespect but they rationalize it anyway) so they always use a condom. I'm convinced that men who are bisexual or men who engage in sex acts with other men (even if they refuse to identify themselves as bi) are in most cases in denial about what they want, about their desires, so they get in the zone, they are all hot and bothered, and they don't use condoms because it's surreal to them. They are outside of their own reality so they suspend reason for fantasy and unsafe sex.
I have tested negative since my foray into stupidity. I’ve only had two lovers in the last 8 years and both were tested completely before we had sex. I sometimes fantasize what it will be like the next time I have sex, imagining that it will be with the man that I spend the rest of my life with. Never once, in all of my visions of love, have I never imagined that he and I use a condom. I can consider myself pretty typical in my behaviors I'm sure, just a whole helluva lot more open and honest about my shortcomings and willing to take responsibility for my HIV status.