Assism is not Feminism

In response to the article ourlegaci.com/2014/11/15/assism-is-not-feminism/

I've been trying desperately to explain to this generation of young women who think that objectifying themselves is empowering that feminism is NOT about being as sexually indiscriminate as men.  I understand, recognize, and fully acknowledge that my generation has let them down.  We have let them be raped, molested, abused, and used.  We have let them grow up in a society that shames them for their sexuality and conversely celebrates men's sexist behaviors.  My generation dropped the ball.  We never told or taught our girls that being sexy should not be their objective.  We never taught our daughters to love themselves as unique human beings and individuals, instead we told them to be beautiful to get a rich man, to sell pussy to pay the bills, to be be competitive and petty with other women.  We didn't show them examples of love, of respectability so they rally against it, they reject and hate the very concept of respectability because they feel as if it invalidates their place on the planet.  We didn't teach them to lift themselves up, we let them wallow in dysfunction and we turned a blind eye to it because we never addressed our hurts from the men who used us, who violated us.

We let our daughters be raised by Zane's tales of adultery and promiscuity without offering a healthier alternative.  We didn't give them guidance and direction about becoming a woman and understanding their sexuality, we let them raise themselves.  Now, we have a generation of women who believe that showing your ass is empowering.  We have a generation of women who believe that being degraded and humiliated during sex is normal and healthy.  We have a nation of young women who righteously want to  strike out and rally against the oppressive forces that look to silence them and diminish them for their identity as Black women but we haven't properly armed them for the fight.  We have allowed them to set their standards so low that they consider barely literate, immature  criminals, thugs, and violent males as ideal partners.  We've not given them anything to strive for, no standards to set for themselves so they rally, they fight, they violently defend conforming to sexist, patriarchal, and demeaning sexual objectification because that's all they know.

My generation has to take full responsibility for dropping the ball.   We are to blame.  We let our daughters think that having a big ass gave them value, that having a man with money was more important than having a man with integrity.  We didn't teach them the difference between not being ashamed of their sexuality versus being proud of being vulgar.  They think the world is defined by their flagrant sexuality.  Deep inside, they want to feel valued and loved and understood for more than their sex, they have the very human need to be connected and partnered but we haven't shown them anything close to a healthy relationship let alone how to sustain one so they get offended if a man speaks to them, they are disgusted when someone suggests that all they've known to be true and right is wrong.


Assism is not Feminism but to tell that to a generation who has been raised with Beyonce flaunting her sexuality, with the degradation of women in porn available 24 hours a day before they become fully mature sexual adults, the subculture of weavism and housewives who don't do any housework but who marry one dimensional, sexist men with money has completely handicapped the Black community.  We've let boys continue with their emotionally immature, sexist, oppressive, bullshit and we've let girls think that wearing seven inch heels that cost as much as rent makes them have more value.