AfroerotiK
Erotic provocateur, racially-influenced humanist, relentless champion for the oppressed, and facilitator for social change, Scottie Lowe is the brain child, creative genius and the blood, sweat, and tears behind AfroerotiK. Intended to be part academic, part educational, and part sensual, she, yes SHE gave birth to the website to provide people of African descent a place to escape the narrow-mined, stereotypical, limiting and oft-times degrading beliefs that abound about our sexuality. No, not all Black men are driven by lust by white flesh or to create babies and walk away. No, not all Black women are promiscuous welfare queens. And as hard as it may be to believe, no, not all gay Black men are feminine, down low, or HIV positive. Scottie is putting everything on the table to discuss, debate, and dismantle stereotypes in a healthy exchange of ideas. She hopes to provide a more holistic, informed, and enlightened discussion of Black sexuality and dreams of helping couples be more open, honest, and adventurous in their relationships.
Thursday, January 03, 2013
America is too racially immature for a movie like Django
Prior to seeing the movie, I was very much aligned with the Spike Lee camp of detractors who were pretty outraged that a white person would dare to tell the story of slavery. Having only seen one movie by Mr. Tarantino previously, I was not impressed with his cultural sensitivity to the Asian people and wasn’t expecting much more than a gross/cartoonish depiction of the horrors my ancestors endured. I can say without reservation that Django unchained offered THE most accurate depiction of slavery I’ve ever seen in a non-documentary film. Hats off to Mr. Tarantino for not only doing his homework about what slaves had to endure but also kudos to him for grasping and interpreting the dynamics of race relations that very few people, white or black, seem to be able to comprehend.
Much has been made about his excessive use of the N word. I, personally, don’t ever use the word unless it is in the most academic of discussions. I do not think it has been morphed into some sort of term of endearment and I fully recognize its impact when said in front of white people. My ancestors bled and died at the base of that word so I refuse to casually throw it around out of respect to them. The Black people who do use it, especially those who feel comfortable using it in front of other races, are largely ignorant of the impact of the word or the origins and stigmas attached to it. Black people today use it because, for centuries, that’s what we were called and that’s all we knew ourselves to be. The messages passed down generationally haven’t changed one bit and its use today is almost exactly as it was intended to be used during slavery. That being said, there was not one instance in the movie where the N word was used inappropriately. It was used in the exact context and frequency that it was used during slavery. The theater I went to see the movie at was predominantly white and movie goers laughed and chuckled at the use of the word, largely out of nervous discomfort and I suspect because that’s the way they use the word in private conversations and they were rattled by its free/uninhibited use. One can only assume they felt a certain level of comfort being around other whites and confident that the Black movie goers more than likely use the word so frequently there was no fear of reprimand or riot. What the movie did was create an atmosphere of acceptance of the word whereby whites could go home and discuss the movie and casually throw the word around without respect or reverence for its impact.
The gentleman who sat next to my boyfriend apparently thought EVERYTHING in the movie was funny. He laughed incessantly throughout the entire film. It took every ounce of strength in my body not to take my shoe off and beat his ass to a bloody pulp. I was so outraged, so angry that I seethed and burned with hatred for him. His insensitivity and callous disrespect made me see red. My boyfriend, who is not of African descent, didn’t seem to take issue with him whatsoever. He saw my discomfort and he ignored it. He didn’t ask me if I was okay, he didn’t tell the guy to shut the FUCK up, he felt the white man had a right to respond in whatever what he wanted and that I just had to suck it up. Had I been laughing throughout a Holocaust movie inappropriately, the usher, the manager, and a half a dozen movie goers would have insisted that I leave. Had I been with a Black man, he would have insisted that the guy shut up and put the fear of God in him. Again, I have no doubt in my mind that we would have asked to leave the theater, not the man who disrupted and ruined the experience for me. It just proves that today, as in slavery, that if you’re white, you’re right, if you’re black, stay back. Not much has changed since slavery. The feelings, opinions, and personhood of Black people is insignificant to that of whites.
I do not watch violence as a rule so a great portion of the movie I spent with my eyes closed. Tarantino made a shoot ‘em film with carnage galore. I can’t imagine that the gun violence was any greater than most movies but the most chilling scenes were the ones where the violence was an accurate of what slave life was like. The slave being ripped apart by dogs, the Mandingo fights to the death, and the brutal rape, whippings, torture, branding, and abuse of slaves was chilling and accurate. Movie goers don’t get that. To them, it was all a part of the entertainment, made up.
There is much that movies goers, both white and black, are too uninformed/ignorant to get. Samuel L. Jackson’s role was one that depicted the relationship of the house nigger to the master. Because our conversations about race in this country are so superficial and juvenile, the understanding of how a slave with the consciousness of a Stephen could exist. Left to their own devices, moviegoers will assume that he was a self-serving, back-stabbing slave with an agenda to better himself and control/destroy all the other slaves. In reality, house slaves were the creation of slave masters and their allegiance was part and parcel of the system of slavery that needed slaves pitted against one another for its survival.
With the exception of the white protagonist, white people in the movie were depicted as stupid, outrageously cruel, and one-dimensional. They were lazy, treated slaves with despicable inhumane torture and were nonchalant and flippant about using their property, HUMAN BEINGS, for whatever deviant purpose their puny brains could conjure. Slave owners were just that.
There are many more aspects of the movie that could be dissected, examined, and discussed but, unfortunately, America is too racially immature to have any such discussions. White people are insistent upon inflecting the comment, “I’m not racist,” “Slavery was in the past, let it go,” or, “Can’t we all just get along,” into every conversation about race. They control conversations about race with their ignorance and refusal to learn, accept a different point of view, and their thinly-veiled racist beliefs. How many white people watched that movie and went home to watch interracial porn where the N word is thrown around like rice at a wedding? How many white people who say the movie routinely refer to Obama as a nigger and go on rants online where they hide behind a computer screen to espouse racist beliefs? If I’ve said it once I’ve said it a million times. White people have to wear a sheet, burn a cross, and run around screaming, “I hate niggers,” before another white person will dare to imply that they MIGHT be racist.
Black people are just as misguided. Black people think the movie represents some form of revenge, a win for Blacks as it were. Bullshit! That part was fiction. The concept of a Black man being a gun-wielding bad-ass and able to ride off into the sunset with his lady love is more like science fiction. But Black people are so willing to embrace that “feel good” dynamic of the movie because we don’t want to face our shame and humiliation at being connected to a slave past. EVERYONE wants to assume that they would be the one slave in 10,000 who would revolt and kick ass and take names later. The truth of the matter is, slaves were subservient and bred to be docile and millions upon millions of slaves conformed to the rules in order to live, to survive, because they didn’t know any other way. Black people are terrified to acknowledge a connection to a slave past because they feel as if recognizing the impact of slavery on themselves means that they are by default inherently inferior.
It won’t be until we can have an intelligent, informed, comprehension about slavery, race, and all its many, messy complexities that a movie like Django will be effective. For now, we are painfully diseased and incapable of having a dialogue about slavery/racism that goes beyond any more than cliché and rhetoric. Django was created with the potential to create an amazing dialogue about race but sadly, the nation just isn’t ready for that.
Copyright 2013 Scottie Lowe
Thursday, December 27, 2012
Wednesday, December 26, 2012
Q&A with Jessica Holter of The Punany Poets 12/26 by AfroerotiK | Blog Talk Radio
On Friday, December 28th, 2012, Scottie Lowe of AfroerotiK and Jessica Holter of The Punany Poets will join forces for the very first time to bring you a night of sensational erotica at The Crucible in Washington DC. Join the BTR discussion as these two very powerful women of erotica give their insights, thoughts, and feelings about all things erotic and share some poetic teasers of what the night will bring. And for those lucky enough to make it to the show on the 28th, they will see the premiere of Sensu-Soul, the hot Black erotic video that is creating quite a buzz.
Friday, December 21, 2012
Race Play and the Kink Community 12/22 by AfroerotiK | Blog Talk Radio
Sunday, December 16, 2012
"Oh, the shame of it all" - Releasing fear of our Sexuality 12/19 by AfroerotiK | Blog Talk Radio
Join with me as we discuss what constitutes a healthy sense of sexuality, the detriments to believing sex is bad, naughty, taboo, or unspeakable, and how to rid ourselves of the fear of being seen as sexual beings.
Friday, December 07, 2012
The Revolution has to be Televised
Black Dicks for White Chicks
Who Wants a Revolution?
Wednesday, October 24, 2012
Sex and Sensuality Part 2 w/ "The Honey Diva" Tracey Bryant 10/25 by AfroerotiK | Blog Talk Radio
The first show was so great, we had to do a part 2. Joining me for this very sensual and arousing topic is my sister in eroticism, The One and Only Tracey Bryant aka "The Honey Diva” of http://www.blogtalkradio.com/honeysoul and http://www.honeyluvromance.com/ She will be here to share her insights and opinions on the topic and spread the gospel of intimacy, communication, and romance in Black relationships as well. She is a love and intimacy coach and you will be riveted by her insights and knowledge. We will continue to explore the things that help make us more sensual, loving, intimate partners in our relationships. It's a show you won't want to miss.
Thursday, October 04, 2012
Losing My Pretty Person Privilege
Attractiveness is subjective. For some, especially in the Black community, specifically when it comes to women, it means looking almost white. You have to have light skin, long hair, a narrow nose, and thin lips before you can be considered beautiful. That’s not the only definition of beauty but it’s certainly the pervasive one. I’ve never in my life looked like that. I have decidedly African features: very short hair, high cheekbones, a wide nose, full lips, and milk chocolate skin. For most of my adult life, however, I’ve been considered attractive by the general populous. That is not to say that I am gorgeous or I could have beauty pageant contestant but simply that I was closer to pretty than homely-looking. I’m 5’10” and I have been slender almost my entire adult life, thus, I rocked the hell out of anything I wore. In my lifetime, some have considered me beautiful, others not so much, but the general consensus was that I was pretty. There have been more than a few men who have looked past me and not looked back because I didn’t look like Beyonce: my hair was too short and I was too brown for their particular tastes. Conversely, I can say that there have been quite a few men who have fallen all over themselves to kick it with me just because I represented a look they thought was attractive.
Being considered attractive has perks. Perks I’ve always acknowledged, I’ve just never really wanted to exploit or give too much weight in my life because I am, or at least considered myself, a woman of substance, not at all superficial. Just as light skinned women have advantages in this society (ones it seems they NEVER want to acknowledge) and thinner women have advantages (at least in society at large even though the acceptance of BBWs in the Black community is greater) pretty people have advantages as well. Being a pretty woman means you will get doors opened for you, you can walk out in the street and cars will come to screeching halt to let you have the right of way. Being pretty, people treat you with more reverence, as if your opinion is more valid, as if you have more of a right to be heard than less attractive men and women. In addition to the amount of suitors one gets (which is not always a perk because some individuals ONLY want you for your looks) and the efforts they make to impress you. Dinners are more expensive for the pretty person, they get the offers for the weekend trips and the theater and the front row seats at the concert rather than the offers to rent a movie and order pizza at home.
When they say “beauty fades” they weren’t lying. I’ve lost my standing as a pretty person. While I was once considered a pretty person with all the advantages thereof, due to age, weight gain, a big ole brown tooth right in the front of my mouth, and mostly because of a condition called ptosis (drooping eyelids) I’m no longer seen as attractive. I’ve witnessed a shift in the last five years in how I’m treated by men and society as a whole. No longer do men rush to hold the door for me, they let the door slam in my face and don’t look back. When on dates, men don’t stare longingly at me and ply me with compliments, I usually have to fish for them. Men treat me as if I should be grateful for their attention, almost as if they are doing me a favor by dating me. When I look in the mirror, I see the same person I’ve always seen. I know that I’m not; I know that my eyes have drastically altered my appearance. I know that what society sees now isn’t a pretty woman. Today, I’m much closer to unattractive than I am to pretty.
Even though I’ve never based my self-worth on my appearance, I’ve never been vain, even though I have always valued my intellect as my most important asset, I must admit it’s a bitter pill to swallow having to give up my pretty person privilege. Everyone wants to see themselves as attractive. I think that’s a byproduct of biology. Women are told to base their self-worth on their attractiveness. My thought processes are different now. I react to situations differently now based on how I think people see me. I feel insecure when I’m in an intimate situation today, having once felt desired and coveted for my looks (and body) now, I feel almost ashamed of myself, like I’m less deserving of sexual pleasure than attractive women. It is a very unique situation, having been on both sides of the fence, having lived life as pretty and now not so pretty.
This isn’t just some random commentary on my low self-esteem or an attempt to garner people’s pity. It’s as much about me speaking my truth in order to empower myself as it is really about the shallow nature of humanity and how we treat more attractive people as if they have more value. I’m the same person inside as I was before. I have the same dreams, fears, desires, goals, and beliefs. I have the same sexual desires as well. I want to feel valuable, I want to feel attractive and desirable. I’ve convinced myself that I have less value simply because of the way society treats me. That’s as much my fault as it is society’s fault. I shouldn’t put weight on how others see me, I know this. I should see myself as beautiful, inside and out, and be happy with the package I come in, regardless of how it appears to others. The idolization of beauty is detrimental to our society and I’m only just seeing it now. I don’t know what it’s like to have never knows what it feels like to be considered attractive, I don’t know how my personality and choices would be different in life had I not been gifted with the genetics that allowed me to have pretty person privilege. I don’t have that privilege any more. I shouldn’t want it back but the sad truth is that I do.
Copyright 2012 Scottie Lowe
Thursday, September 13, 2012
Sex and Sensuality w/ "The Honey Diva" Tracey Bryant 09/13 by AfroerotiK | Blog Talk Radio
Joining me for this very sensual and arousing topic is my sister in eroticism, The One and Only Tracey Bryant aka "The Honey Diva” of http://www.blogtalkradio.com/honeysoul and http://www.honeyluvromance.com/ She will be here to share her insights and opinions on the topic and spread the gospel of intimacy, communication, and romance in Black relationships as well. She is a love and intimacy coach and you will be riveted by her insights and knowledge.
Monday, September 10, 2012
Minority Affairs: Intense Interracial Erotica
The intensity, ingenuity, and boldness of Minority Affairs is sure to leave you a changed person. Never before have you read such a unique examination of race and sexuality; never again will you be able to look at erotic stories of black and white lovers quite the same way. Complex stories of love and romance, extreme stories of domination and submission, alternative stories that push the boundaries of gender and identity, and BREATHTAKING IMAGES all fill the pages of this groundbreaking book.
You’ll find stories that frighten your sensibilities, characters you love, characters you know, and sex that leaves you breathless. You’ll ache for Charles as he agonizes in his quest to replicate the true slave experience and you’ll cheer for Kevin as he woos the heart of an artist and an equal. Kamal will teach you about the true strength and character of Black men and you’ll witness the transformation of Olutuunde to a Goddess before your very eyes. You’ll swear that you’ve experienced the smells, sights, and sounds of each story in vivid technicolor detail, in the exact same ways the characters did. Minority Affairs is a book you will want to read, and read again, it’s one you will be afraid to talk about with others, and it will inform your choices, perceptions, and fantasies.
http://www.amazon.com/dp/B0095JNHBQ