The Revolution has to be Televised

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Black Dicks for White Chicks

There is this common lie that Black men tell when justifying their hatred of Black women that they are sleeping with white women today to make up for the hundreds of years that white men raped Black women during slavery.  I’d have to be a deaf, dumb, blind and mentally handicapped fool . . . in a coma before I’d believe any stupidity like that.  Black men don’t make a conscious decision to date white women because so many Black women were raped at the hands of white men, and he is seeking some sort of karmic revenge.  The conscious decision to sleep with, date, and marry white women is made because Black men think white women are better. 

First of all, most of the brothas that are dating/fucking white women couldn’t tell you two historical facts about slavery in a ten minute period.  Somehow, some deluded dude came up with the idea and it spread like wildfire in order to justify their actions and not call it out for what it is, self-hatred.  I have never met a brother who was so proud of his Black heritage and culture that he decided to seek his own brand of reparations from society and have his way sexually with the white woman to make up for the years of degradation that Black women have suffered.  And even if I did, he’d be tragically misguided in his efforts because sleeping with white women doesn’t do a damn thing to white men other than fuel their fantasies and reinforce that Black men are sexual savages. 

The NEED to date white women, because they are more supportive/more submissive/ more attractive has to do with subconscious brain washing.  Brainwashing subjected to us by our forefathers.  Tell me of one set of grandparents that didn’t fear their grandchild going out in the sun because they might get too black. The thought processes of the plantation are not that far removed from our consciousness.  During slavery, light skinned women were allowed the luxury to be in the house, thus, as a Black man, to get one meant you might have some special privileges.  White women were even more privileged. Those were the reinforcements that our grandparents were taught by their grandparents.  Just because we have stopped delving into the origins of our sickness, does not mean the disease is not rampant. 

Black men date white women because all of their lives they are told that light "skinded"  women are the most beautiful.  Stands to reason if light women are the prettiest Black women, white women would be even more beautiful still.  Think about it, they don't have to spend money to get their hair straight.  They can give him children that are light with good hair and pretty eyes, thus less black.  And we all know that deep down, these black men believe that Black is ugly.  Show me the man that says, “I want my child to have short, wooly hair, a wide nose, thick lips and blacker than coal skin.”  Those things are not revered in our society.  I'm not saying a man with that consciousness does not exist, I'm saying that in this society, the Black man (and woman) is taught to love everything opposite of that.

 

Raise a child with images of white women as the standard of beauty, and what do you expect him to gravitate to.  If you look in the mirror and hate your blackness, you are going to do whatever it takes to remove yourself from it.  Once he gets the white woman, and finds that she's docile and doesn't expect anything from him other than his sexual stud service, that she that she has no expectations for him other than to sex her up, you have the recipe that makes for Black men choosing white women en masse.

Who Wants a Revolution?

Black people today have such an apathy and complacent nature, we've become so accepting of degrading images of us, even DEFENDING and celebrating them, that it's impossible to start a revolution.  Black people are too busy rationalizing their dysfunction to have a revolution.  Revolution for what?  No one wants anything to change!  There's no doubt in my mind that we've de-evolved as a people since the days of the civil rights movement.  There is no more thirst for knowledge; there is no commitment to integrity. 

People don't even think for themselves any more.  I can't tell you how many times that I hear people say, "Oh nooooo, violent movies and video games aren't bad for you, I watch them all the time and nothing's wrong with me," when every study that's been done on the effect of viewing violent images has proven that it desensitizes people to violence.  That's just one tiny example of how people are steeped in their ignorance and not willing to see past their dysfunction.  There are too many to count and there isn't anyone who is willing to challenge the status quo and speak out about the things that are detrimental to us because too many people love their dysfunction.  Nobody except me, that is.

Want to know what's revolutionary thinking?

Black women straightening their hair is physically and psychologically damaging. 

Black men are raised to be emotionally immature.

The psychological effects of slavery are so long lasting and pervasive they haven't even begun to be examined.

Homosexuality is natural and normal and homophobia is pathological and disturbed

Christianity is in no way related to the study and pursuit of the Creator and it is damaging for people of African descent to hold on to those paralyzing beliefs. 

I can back up all of my assertions with facts but the majority of people don't want to hear anything about , truth, facts, or revolution.  They want to have a march and say, "Stop discrimination now," for a few days after a white person says something racist.  We don't even have a clear picture of what discrimination and racism is, and how it affects us.  The exact same people that want a revolution aren't even willing to put the blame on white people for our conditions.  You can't have a revolution if you are afraid to place accountability on the culprits of generations of abuse without falling all over yourself to apologize for speaking up for yourself.  You can't have a revolution if the only thing you know about Dr. King is "I have a dream." 

You want a revolution?  I got a revolution for you but no one is going to join the revolution because it goes against the current dementia that is accepted as norm.  The days of sit ins and marches is over.  Now is the time for real revolution. 

Sex and Sensuality Part 2 w/ "The Honey Diva" Tracey Bryant 10/25 by AfroerotiK | Blog Talk Radio

Sex and Sensuality Part 2 w/ "The Honey Diva" Tracey Bryant 10/25 by AfroerotiK | Blog Talk Radio

The first show was so great, we had to do a part 2.  Joining me for this very sensual and arousing topic is my sister in eroticism, The One and Only Tracey Bryant aka "The Honey Diva” of http://www.blogtalkradio.com/honeysoul and http://www.honeyluvromance.com/ She will be here to share her insights and opinions on the topic and spread the gospel of intimacy, communication, and romance in Black relationships as well. She is a love and intimacy coach and you will be riveted by her insights and knowledge.  We will continue to explore the things that help make us more sensual, loving, intimate partners in our relationships.  It's a show you won't want to miss.  

Losing My Pretty Person Privilege

Attractiveness is subjective.  For some, especially in the Black community, specifically when it comes to women, it means looking almost white.  You have to have light skin, long hair, a narrow nose, and thin lips before you can be considered beautiful.  That’s not the only definition of beauty but it’s certainly the pervasive one.  I’ve never in my life looked like that.  I have decidedly African features: very short hair, high cheekbones, a wide nose, full lips, and milk chocolate skin.  For most of my adult life, however, I’ve been considered attractive by the general populous.  That is not to say that I am gorgeous or I could have beauty pageant contestant but simply that I was closer to pretty than homely-looking.  I’m 5’10” and I have been slender almost my entire adult life, thus, I rocked the hell out of anything I wore.  In my lifetime, some have considered me beautiful, others not so much, but the general consensus was that I was pretty.  There have been more than a few men who have looked past me and not looked back because I didn’t look like Beyonce: my hair was too short and I was too brown for their particular tastes.  Conversely, I can say that there have been quite a few men who have fallen all over themselves to kick it with me just because I represented a look they thought was attractive. 

Being considered attractive has perks.  Perks I’ve always acknowledged, I’ve just never really wanted to exploit or give too much weight in my life because I am, or at least considered myself, a woman of substance, not at all superficial.  Just as light skinned women have advantages in this society (ones it seems they NEVER want to acknowledge) and thinner women have advantages (at least in society at large even though the acceptance of BBWs in the Black community is greater) pretty people have advantages as well.  Being a pretty woman means you will get doors opened for you, you can walk out in the street and cars will come to screeching halt to let you have the right of way.  Being pretty, people treat you with more reverence, as if your opinion is more valid, as if you have more of a right to be heard than less attractive men and women.  In addition to the amount of suitors one gets (which is not always a perk because some individuals ONLY want you for your looks) and the efforts they make to impress you.  Dinners are more expensive for the pretty person, they get the offers for the weekend trips and the theater and the front row seats at the concert rather than the offers to rent a movie and order pizza at home. 

When they say “beauty fades” they weren’t lying.  I’ve lost my standing as a pretty person.  While I was once considered a pretty person with all the advantages thereof, due to age, weight gain, a big ole brown tooth right in the front of my mouth, and mostly because of a condition called ptosis (drooping eyelids) I’m no longer seen as attractive.  I’ve witnessed a shift in the last five years in how I’m treated by men and society as a whole.  No longer do men rush to hold the door for me, they let the door slam in my face and don’t look back.  When on dates, men don’t stare longingly at me and ply me with compliments, I usually have to fish for them.  Men treat me as if I should be grateful for their attention, almost as if they are doing me a favor by dating me.  When I look in the mirror, I see the same person I’ve always seen.  I know that I’m not; I know that my eyes have drastically altered my appearance.  I know that what society sees now isn’t a pretty woman.  Today, I’m much closer to unattractive than I am to pretty. 

Even though I’ve never based my self-worth on my appearance, I’ve never been vain, even though I have always valued my intellect as my most important asset, I must admit it’s a bitter pill to swallow having to give up my pretty person privilege.   Everyone wants to see themselves as attractive.  I think that’s a byproduct of biology.  Women are told to base their self-worth on their attractiveness.  My thought processes are different now.  I react to situations differently now based on how I think people see me.  I feel insecure when I’m in an intimate situation today, having once felt desired and coveted for my looks (and body) now, I feel almost ashamed of myself, like I’m less deserving of sexual pleasure than attractive women.  It is a very unique situation, having been on both sides of the fence, having lived life as pretty and now not so pretty. 

This isn’t just some random commentary on my low self-esteem or an attempt to garner people’s pity.  It’s as much about me speaking my truth in order to empower myself as it is really about the shallow nature of humanity and how we treat more attractive people as if they have more value.  I’m the same person inside as I was before.  I have the same dreams, fears, desires, goals, and beliefs.  I have the same sexual desires as well.  I want to feel valuable, I want to feel attractive and desirable.  I’ve convinced myself that I have less value simply because of the way society treats me.  That’s as much my fault as it is society’s fault.  I shouldn’t put weight on how others see me, I know this.  I should see myself as beautiful, inside and out, and be happy with the package I come in, regardless of how it appears to others.  The idolization of beauty is detrimental to our society and I’m only just seeing it now.  I don’t know what it’s like to have never knows what it feels like to be considered attractive, I don’t know how my personality and choices would be different in life had I not been gifted with the genetics that allowed me to have pretty person privilege.  I don’t have that privilege any more.  I shouldn’t want it back but the sad truth is that I do. 

Copyright 2012 Scottie Lowe

Sex and Sensuality w/ "The Honey Diva" Tracey Bryant 09/13 by AfroerotiK | Blog Talk Radio

Sex and Sensuality w/ "The Honey Diva" Tracey Bryant 09/13 by AfroerotiK | Blog Talk Radio

This is the show you’ve been waiting for.  On this episode we will be discussing all things erotic.  This is where you can let down your hair, explore your sensual side, and revel in your pleasure.   Exploring our passionate, creative, uninhibited sexuality is our birthright.  The shame, stigma, and fear of our own sensual selves impedes our spiritual, mental and emotional growth.  If you want to feel validated in your desires, if you want to learn to feel comfortable with your fantasies and fetishes, if you want to find a new way to look at sexuality, tune in and buckle up, it’s going to be a bumpy ride. Of course, as always, I'll be debuting a brand new piece of erotica for your listening pleasure.

Joining me for this very sensual and arousing topic is my sister in eroticism, The One and Only Tracey Bryant aka "The Honey Diva” of http://www.blogtalkradio.com/honeysoul and http://www.honeyluvromance.com/ She will be here to share her insights and opinions on the topic and spread the gospel of intimacy, communication, and romance in Black relationships as well. She is a love and intimacy coach and you will be riveted by her insights and knowledge.

Minority Affairs: Intense Interracial Erotica

The intensity, ingenuity, and boldness of Minority Affairs is sure to leave you a changed person. Never before have you read such a unique examination of race and sexuality; never again will you be able to look at erotic stories of black and white lovers quite the same way. Complex stories of love and romance, extreme stories of domination and submission, alternative stories that push the boundaries of gender and identity, and BREATHTAKING IMAGES all fill the pages of this groundbreaking book.

You’ll find stories that frighten your sensibilities, characters you love, characters you know, and sex that leaves you breathless. You’ll ache for Charles as he agonizes in his quest to replicate the true slave experience and you’ll cheer for Kevin as he woos the heart of an artist and an equal. Kamal will teach you about the true strength and character of Black men and you’ll witness the transformation of Olutuunde to a Goddess before your very eyes. You’ll swear that you’ve experienced the smells, sights, and sounds of each story in vivid technicolor detail, in the exact same ways the characters did. Minority Affairs is a book you will want to read, and read again, it’s one you will be afraid to talk about with others, and it will inform your choices, perceptions, and fantasies.

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B0095JNHBQ

Redefining Black Manhood with Arielle Loren 08/16 by AfroerotiK | Blog Talk Radio

Redefining Black Manhood with Arielle Loren 08/16 by AfroerotiK | Blog Talk Radio

Nigga, thug, balla, stud, Mandingo, player, dog, provider, masculine, drug dealer, head of household, hard, athlete, criminal, threat to society . . . all of these words have been used to describe the Black man.  Join with me tonight as we start painting a new picture of what it means to be a Black man. 

Loving, nurturing, supportive, available, mature, sensitive, equal, partner, committed, sensual, compassionate, regal, proud, strong, resilient . . . all  of these words are words that will define the NEW Black man, one who is working on being a better man and healing his emotional issues.  Join me tonight in the conversation that will frame the concept of evolved Black manhood. 

This Woman's Worth 08/02 by AfroerotiK | Blog Talk Radio

This Woman's Worth 08/02 by AfroerotiK | Blog Talk Radio

What value does a Black woman have?  Is she little more than a “thing” a man chooses to cater to his ego and sense of masculinity and his sexual desires?  What makes a Black woman have merit and worth?  Is her value dependent upon her number of past lovers, the size of her behind or how to make it clap?  Is she only to be judged based on her ability to cook, clean, or her propensity to allow men to lie, cheat and be emotionally immature without complaint?  Is the Black woman a really a slut, a whore, and a bitch, is she nothing more than a gold-digger and manipulator?  How have we gone from demanding respect for ourselves to placing our value as women in our ability to fuck?

Join with me as I discuss the true value of a Black woman, where we’ve gone wrong, and how to heal our misperceptions.  This show is required listening for all Black men and women.  Celebrate the Black woman, rejoice in the divine feminine, and restore the Black woman to her true place as Queen and Goddess.  Joining me for this discussion will be Jawanza Amennun, a yogi, activist, erotic artist, musician, esoteric poet, and emotional healer.  The self-proclaimed “Unapologetic Goddess Worshipper” will be enlightening us with his thoughts and perceptions poetry, on how to create a larger community of men of good will towards women, and so much more. 

Society told me a secret.

Society told me a secret that a white woman’s pussy tastes better than mine.  That’s exactly what society wants me to believe.  There is this rumor going around that white woman is prettier, no, no, she’s HOT.  She’s sexier, she’s better in bed; she’s more sophisticated and less sassy.  Everyone, and I do mean everyone, desires a white woman; she’s the epitome of beauty and lust.  The white woman is a sign of status, she lets Black men know that they have arrived when they can have her on his arm; she’s the trophy to be put on display.  She sure is beautiful, flawless even up there on that pedestal, the ultimate object of desire.

I have to wonder though, is a Latina woman’s sex really that much better than mine?  Ay caramba, it must be, society told me so.  She’s got more sazon, she’s spicier, she’s muy caliente and fine.  Her Spanish and African blood makes her just right mixture of all things sensual, not an ugly savage like me.  You see, that’s what I’m led to believe by the whispers of the slaves who are no longer beaten by the massa’s whips and tethered by steel and iron chains but by the ones who drive expensive whips and wear gold chains around their necks.  They tell me that Carmen is sooo, soooo very fine.  Who am I to compare?  Just a regular ole Black chick, not sexy in any way, ghetto and unwanted. 

Wait, what’s that you say?  Oh damn, not the Asian chick too!  She’s submissive and demure and her coochie is tighter.  Man, a sista can’t win.  OK, that’s it, there’s no one else in line before me.  Wait, biracial women too?  Alright, I can see that.  They are only half black so I’ll take a step back.  Two steps you say?  Oh, got it.  Light skinned women, damn, I forgot. 

Well, I’ve got news for you society, you’ve got it all wrong.  You see, I am the original woman, all life comes from me.  I will not let you dictate my self esteem and sense of worth based on your lies.  You may have forgotten, you may have been misled.  But I’m here to tell you that I Am beautiful, I am sensual, I desirable and you’re just plain wrong. 

My black as midnight skin is like satin and silk to touch.  You see, Black don’t crack and it absorbs the sun.  Feel the heat of my spirit rise as you experience a true Goddess.   My eyes are deep and dark and they’ve seen a lot of pain but they reflect my inner light that shines so bright, unafraid to be Black, proud to be sexy. My sensual lips are full and made for kissing, my full, round hips sway and swerve in rhythmic time.  You tell me my features are too full, not refined.  I say kiss my entire Black ass.  You told me to cover my thick, natural, nappy, African, wooly hair, that I should be ashamed.  I can create more styles with my mane of glory than any white woman ever could and make them all look good.  My breasts are full and heavy and my milk flows like the river Nile.  My nipples stand proud like Kilimanjaro, hard like a diamond mined, my sacred blood nourishes the generations.  I am mother earth, I am Africa.  I am Egypt and Ghana and Timbuktu. I am the Sahara and Sudan and Madagascar.  I am the starry night sky and dessert plains.  I am Cleopatra and Sheba and Venus Hottentot too.  I am the antelope and the cheetah simultaneously; I am the hunter and the hunted.  I am the gentle waves of an unforgiving dark ocean lapping at the hull of the slave ship. 

So, I invite you to experience sex the way it was meant to be, with the original woman, and you will see that I’m not the lowly thing you’ve tried to convince me I am.  Do you smell that, that intoxicating scent?  That’s my beautiful black pussy, deliciously pink hot wet and sweet.  Taste that sacred space, that holy temple.  My juices taste like honey so sweet.  I will give you my surrender, my uncontrolled cries of passion.  Fill your hands with my thick ass, lose yourself  inside me.  Join with me and as you feel my silky wet walls envelop you, surround you, bathe you in dark divinity.  Make love to me, pleasure me.  Fill me with your seed. Society knows that I am beautiful, sexy, and erotic.   I will ascend to take my rightful place as coveted and desired, the Black woman, compared to none. 

Copyright 2012 AfroerotiK All Rights Reserved

Race and Sexuality w/Tristan Taormino & Cherie Ann Turpin 07/26 by AfroerotiK | Blog Talk Radio

Race and Sexuality w/Tristan Taormino & Cherie Ann Turpin 07/26 by AfroerotiK | Blog Talk Radio

Call in and listen.  (347) 945-6538.  It's going down in less than an hour.  

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Race and Sexuality w/Tristan Taormino & Cherie Ann Turpin 07/26 by AfroerotiK | Blog Talk Radio

Race and Sexuality w/Tristan Taormino & Cherie Ann Turpin 07/26 by AfroerotiK | Blog Talk Radio

In the adult industry, white women are “Hot,” Latina women are “Exotic,” Asian women are “Dolls,” and black women are   "Bitchez." Black men are “Mandingos,” and  "Niggaz," and white men run the entire show.  Join us for an in-depth conversation about race and sexuality where we talk about the implications and effects of continued stereotypes and racism in the adult industry and the how it affects perceptions in society.  In the house will be two dynamic ladies helping to peel back the layers of how race and sexuality impact culture.

Tristan Taormino is an award-winning writer, sex educator, speaker, radio host and feminist pornographer. She is the editor of 25 anthologies and author of seven books, including The Secrets of Female Ejaculation and Great G-Spot Orgasms and her latest, The Ultimate Guide to Kink: BDSM, Role Play and the Erotic Edge. She writes an advice column for Taboo Magazine. Check out her radio show, Sex Out Loud, on the Voice America Variety Channel.

Cherie Ann Turpin is an Associate Professor in the Department of English at the University of the District of Columbia. Dr. Turpin's research areas include African Diaspora Studies, Gender and Sexuality Studies, World Literature, Multicultural American Literature, and Film. She recently published How Three Black Women Writers Combined Spiritual and Sensual Love: Rhetorically Transcending the Boundaries of Language.  She's also host to an online radio show on BlogTalkRadio: At the Edge: An Afrofuturist Salon.  

AfroerotiK is . . .